06.25.10
Posted in Threads of Evolution at 9:33 am by Ruth Evelyn
Ha! Today is a day to smile, be joyful and let out a squeal of “wheeeeeeee”! In March, I began walking backward to walk forward and today I am looking at the new view. This is not a metaphorical view or wishful thinking. This is a new view – or perhaps better said – the view I have been developing for a very long time.
I have a world-changing project that I set aside a long time ago. It’s big – very big. Its immediate audience is small – very small. Connecting with those who would utilize it has been like finding a needle in a massive haystack.
I have another world-changing project that came to a sudden halt in January. It’s big – very big. It’s waiting for my return to its location of creation. Getting there has sometimes seemed to lose momentum these past few months.
I have another world-changing project that isn’t for me to share. It’s big – very big. Aligning the synchronicities for its delivery is still underway. It’s a process.
I have another world-changing project wandering its way through the grid of connecting synchronicities. It’s big – very big. Its moment of now is clearly a not yet.
I have another world-changing project that is calling for attention. It’s big – very big. I can’t seem to wrap my beingness around its presence. It’s here and ready. I am not.
In the meantime, there are a lot of other, smaller steps happening. Immediately upon committing to the regard of my self as whole, I began the journey of walking backward to walk forward. I began with resistance – a lot of resistance. I was only a few steps in and found myself looking forward to experience what I would come to know next.
Every day for two months, I walked into current experience that resembled past experiences where I did not regard myself. Through this, I came to understand the critical value of regard of self and was able to easily make different choices resulting in significant shifts of forward expansion. I discovered the aspects of me that are my wholeness and came to know more intimately the steps of fruition I had been give many years ago – layers.
Within days, my self vortex activated and change stepped up its pace. The pace was so fast, my human me was constantly adjusting to keep up with the shift of energies as the entire self system adjusted itself and me, the human, to meet synchronicities. Through this last change my system was in such a state, I could not easily find the place in me that provided that familiar comfort where I could determine whether I resonated with where I was going or not. So, I decided to communicate with my Plan. There is a plan the self vortex brings forward.
My plan communicated with me in a similar manner as my ethereal Team. Yeah. Things fruiting in my plan were things like “Nothingness dissolves into Somethingness with Someoneness” and “Something gained by ignoring it”. There are a total of seven items in my plan that are now speaking to me in terms of fruit and harvest. Specifics to expect and look for were non-existence – at least as specific as we humans like to get. And, of course, my main focus became the something I would gain by ignoring it – a natural human tendency. However, the more I looked at it, the less I could see its outline so I had to ignore what I was ignoring. No worries there. Change shifted my focus once again and kept me too busy to consider things like fruit.
Over the days of change, I could feel the energies evolve as the old lessened and the new strengthened. Stay still in change and you will know the moment of shift, turn and forward movement. Change is a process. The beauty of living through change by allowing is the other side can hold gifts of great magnitude. In the case of this change in this life that is mine, the great magnitude has shown itself and it is real and tangible.
I have several projects that are world-changing. They are big – very big. Yesterday, Something that dissolves Nothingness with Someoneness was placed in my lap. It happens to hold opportunity for the fruition of all of my projects…except one. Within two hours of actioning myself through this door, there came another knock.
I have a project that is world-changing. It’s big – very big. Even though I believe in it and love its potential course change upon humanity, I set it aside for perhaps another life or lifetime – until its audience was ready, I considered. Yesterday, the door for its offering to the world flung wide open and called me in. A surprise of great magnitude.
Today, I am saying ‘Ha!’ and ‘wheeeeeeee’…it is a day to smile and be joyful…
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06.23.10
Posted in Threads of Evolution at 10:33 am by Ruth Evelyn
It was a delicious dream that ended in a surprise kiss! I had been sketching an image from meditation the night before. The dream, as flowing and delightful as it was, held a message that now has me looking at the dream in a very different light.
The image is of a woven energy suspended between dimensions of non-matter and matter. The weave extends in frequency in all direction, then into my body and the earth. In the image I sketched last night, the energy was attached to my right side – the side of giving and release. The dream, in its lovely detail, provided many indications of things from my past that I was suddenly re-choosing. I changed the image.
After reversing my body on the page, facing backward, I was now receiving the energy through my left – the receiving side. It didn’t feel right, so I turned my head to look at the energy. Returning to meditation, it was still off.
It was when I placed my body image with side view on the page, facing the energy, that the energy in my physical body began to buzz. An activation occurred. When I placed my image within the earth, the vibration turned to a humming flow.
The forward movement of change has begun to take shape.
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06.22.10
Posted in Language of Light, Threads of Evolution at 12:22 pm by Ruth Evelyn
This. Right here. This is the moment of change that I love. It is the stillness. It is the moment when the change has been made and the new has yet to become pronounced. The new has not yet completed its journey into fullness. Only its preceding energies are present.
Sit quietly and you will experience a moment of non-matter emerging into matter. You will know the forming and reforming of minute particles of energy gathering to form form. You will feel the frequencies gathering, attaching, braiding and blending. Listen quietly and you will hear the hum of vibration before the rebirth of change is clear and concise – as concise as something like change can be.
In the midst of change, there is the moment of turn. It is the moment where the energies of the old are just about gone, the energies of the new are filling the vacated space and the aware mind catches up with it all. If you let it, the body will follow suit.
What is it that resists change in us. What is it that balks and insists on returning to what was? Even if what was is an unhealthy pattern, there is an element of mind, body and soul that pulls, pushes, fights, retreats and desires to be in the place of familiar no matter the consequence. Why?
In my body, I have considered away unhealthy choices. I have made a different choice. In my mind, I yearn for return to familiar. In my soul, the way is mixed. In my body, there is a deep desire and excitement for the new. In my mind, I am defiant and expect more for myself than what was. In my soul, the view is mixed.
Why, when choice and desire become manifest, does the body want to return and the mind want to go forward? The mind knows the I should. It is the body that takes the action steps backward…which can, on occasion, be forward. Confusion. When is the forward a step forward and when is it only a fresh look on the same old pattern?
Change is an uneven course. It is untrusted because it is untested. Sometimes, it is untrusted because it is tested. It doesn’t really matter. We like our comfort zones.
This. Right here. This is the moment of change that is my comfort zone. It is the aftermath of shift and just before the new is clarified. This is where creation can be witnessed, encouraged, communicated with…and redirected. It is the aware mind, body and soul that gets to play. Alignment between them is beneficial.
An aligned mind, body and soul in the midst of change pulls itself through transitions with togetherness. We can all be strong when others remain strong around us. This is not different as a single unit in alignment with itself. When all aspects have reached congruency in communication, choice and direction, then congruency in communication, choice and direction become the tools the internal system works with in strength during shift, re-order and chaos.
Change is a constant in our lives. It is more than attitude that gets us through. We can appear to have a good attitude, but when excitement, trust and encouragement walk out the door, despair likes to gather close. No matter the person, circumstance or environment, change will always be present. Change is what creation does and creation is always in all ways.
Attitudes are momentary, surface and easily swayed in the energy of change. It is the internal alignment that keeps us in the strength of confidence and peace. Step from there and living with change becomes a reasonably congruent path rather than a series of cliff jumps or falling off the edge…and falling off the edge is what we are all trying not to do.
The energy of change is consistently taking place. We are always growing with added information from the moment before. If we could only know and pay attention to the molecular transformations taking place, we wouldn’t be so very surprised at change when it occurs. Nor would we be in resistance to the new gently taking place in the fall and rise of shift. If we could know the unseen modifications we create in every moment with every choice…well…then we wouldn’t be experiencing the one thing that gives us the opportunity to experience the full array of what life has to offer.
Change. It is the catalyst that creates the variation of experience. It is because of change that we experience the spectrum of light and dark, old and new. Change is our experience and resistance to it is resistance to why we came to be…to become.
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06.19.10
Posted in Language of Light at 7:22 am by Ruth Evelyn
Last Sunday, a family sat in conversation. It’s a hot summer, so the eight year old wished for rain. They were just beginning their spring cleaning and the fourteen year-old wished they could move everything out of the house, then move it back in as if it were a new home. The parents, being homeowners, considered it was time for new carpet.
On Monday, this family manifested a leak in the bathroom as they left the house for their day. The deluge of water ran throughout the home, ruining the carpet and requiring everything to be moved out. Thoughts with passion become things.
Almost twenty years ago, I sat in the midst of my corporate management comrades listening to an inspirational speaker. One of the first questions asked was, “Who here likes change?” Along with several of my peers, I raised my hand. I love change!
The speaker continued speaking about change, describing it further and asking deeper questions. With each query, less and less hands flew to the air. As it turned out, I was the last of 30-ish managers who passed his test of change with flying colors. I love change!
My life in Texas has not been easy to comprehend….until I considered my friend’s experience with her family. I have been saying for more than two decades how much I thrive on change. It’s practically a mantra for me. The challenge for me here is that the change has been so constant, I can’t even fill out a change of address because I would be gone before the mail was re-routed. I have, once again, manifested change and I’m re-thinking the view.
Change is a good thing for the most part. What I have loved about change is the stagnation that dissipates with the new, fresh arriving energies. While others around me have actually made themselves ill over change, I have almost always been buoyed by it.
When I moved from a large western city to rural New England, I experienced feeling caged as the human population around me practically stood still in their lives. It was the countryside I loved, but the unwillingness to expand didn’t fit my desire for change. I moved back to the city, then craved the country. So, I changed and moved to the sweet mix of mountains, small city and lots and lots of space. The outside was perfect. It was the inside that was not.
Now, I’m in Texas. Part of the why is that I decided to change things that weren’t working. I just forgot to keep the things that were. When I made the decision to come here, I did not take the time to discover the inside was now as perfect as the outside and the ‘not working’ things were a matter of progress – not change.
Change is one thing one day and another thing the next. Progress is an evolution of learning, letting go, allowing, adjusting, growing. Change is abrupt. Progress is gradual with small shifts here and there.
I still like change, because quite frankly, I welcome the swift shift of return to my beloved mountainous experience of hiking, sitting under the stars, amazing views, clear mountain waters, fresh air and no mosquitoes. I am nurtured to the core in that environment. But, I will have to say, the consistency with which I experience change here in Texas in my external landscape is an experience that has worn out its welcome in me.
For years, I balked at sameness…and, sitting here in this writing, I find myself still unwilling to ask for it. Change wins out as preference.
Change. Is there a way to stabilize change? Is there a congruency change offers? That sounds like progress. Stabilizing change. Getting enough footing under my feet to stand before I step…sigh…it makes me feel I’m stopping change. My thoughts becoming things still have passion and desire to create change in my experience…at least until I get to where I desire to be.
Okay, Change, where to next?
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06.09.10
Posted in Threads of Evolution at 4:55 am by Ruth Evelyn
Humanity lost a brilliant mind yesterday. Dr. Pete Farley, a friend, transitioned unexpectedly – at least unexpected to the us that are human.
In the morning, Jeshua stood to my left, very close. “Do you trust me?” he asked. It was reminiscent of a moment years ago when the question was posed, my response affirmative and the result was this same friend and I experiencing a rather miraculous event the next day. We were in awe of the universal gift, surprise and synchronistic moment that catapulted both of us forward. We were in joy.
Today, I am not yet in discovery of the joy of the universal moment that has catapulted my friend into a new forward. The call had come at the same time of Jeshua’s question, but I had left the phone upstairs and was not aware of its presence. I have not sat with Jeshua to know more. I am not yet ready. When I do, the strength of knowingness will reign and those on the other side of the emails and phone calls will want to talk. I cannot yet.
Almost a decade ago, I asked to know how deeply I could love. In my human limitedness, my thoughts of love held place around romantic relationship. I did, indeed, receive that gift. As the experience of love expanded, Pete became part of the equation. It was a tumultuous relationship of business, scientific discovery and a soul-level love that spanned across time. We became friends.
I love Pete. I love that he was in my life. I love what we have done for one another and I love that he became amazed at me and I at him. It is a friendship that others suspected was more, he desired as more and I wouldn’t allow to be more.
Pete is brilliant. He is the reason I put away the pocket dictionary and moved the large dictionary to the living room. In fact, it was because of Pete that I opened the dictionary at all. Pete loved the intelligent mind and mine was stretched by his use of language. He was the first medical doctor to receive a business degree, was among the pioneers bringing biotechnology into mainstream pharmaceuticals, started biotech companies that created Nobel Prize Laureates, consulted for government administrations and frustrated his colleagues with the ease in which he fell into it all. Yet, he was not able to fulfill his deepest dream.
My background includes the business side of medical manufacturing and distribution. His was in medical discovery. It was through working with Pete that I was gifted deeper insight into medical and science research. We are a world that supports logic, fitting in and ease in comprehension. Those who color outside the lines of the pictures on our human pages have been cast aside, shut out and, often, degraded and stripped of credentials. It was Pete’s dream to create a safe-house for out-of-the-box scientists. His experiential tales of such thinkers stretched his conservative self and tantalized his intellectual mind at the edge of boundary. Pete, as well as he fit with his executive self, loved living at the edge of social rule.
Synchronicity is an interesting thing. Often considered chance or coincidence, it is my experience that synchronistic moments are proof of planned events. Often, I know of things before they happen. The question becomes, were they events planned long ago or did they happen because I created them when I knew them in the advance moment of thought? Jeshua was very much a part of the party Pete, myself and others played in throughout our shared moments of scientific advancement. It was Jeshua who urged me to blindly grab an old journal out of storage a week or so ago. I have one page left in the journal I am currently working and, yesterday, spent two hours looking for a new one – all the while getting a message to use the unused pages of the old journal sitting in my backpack.
I did not open the old journal until early evening. Sitting right there in the first few pages is the channeled structure of Pete’s safe-house business. I could not read it all. Jeshua pressed forward urging me to read it in full. When I did, there it was. My role, my part. While Pete’s dream did not come about in fullness, its thread is unbroken. It is a bit much to comprehend in the moment, but the scientific breakthroughs continue. In the past few months, as I have been reconnected with the science community, the legacy of Pete continues. He is the one who brought me into confidence of the confidence of science, its competitive nature and the regard of rightful claim. It is a delicate dance and I know the steps.
I am one of the lucky ones. Pete is not lost to me forever and is still part of my life’s equation. In a few days, when all is strength again in my emotional world, I will commune with my beloved Peter, deliver messages for the family and know more. I miss him, though. He delighted in being contrary. In more willing moments, he served as mirror, which made me grow – albeit through a lot of resistance!
The thing that humbles me most, out of all that he brought to my table, is – as in awe as I have been with his brilliance and experience…he was equally in awe of my brilliance and experience. As alike as we were different, we opened up worlds to one another and that expanded all of us.
Namaste, dear Peter. Namaste.
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